Okay, John, point taken. I can see why you say that our fears are best allayed when confronted head-on with a trusted friend, spoken aloud and heard, and thus, dispelled into vapor. Maybe finding that person who can mirror our feelings is trickier than it sounds, and even when we find that person, he or she can only say or do so much.
I do agree that we all share similar-to-exactly-the-same fears. What we do NOT all share is the same perspective on those fears, nor do we all share the same self-realization of our fears. There are many people out there in the world that just don't dwell on their thoughts, feelings, emotions, fears. They march on through life, all action and little thought. And you know, you just can't talk to those people. They look at you like you're nuts, and when they look at you like that, you start to feel nuts.
Of course, there are plenty of people at the other end of the spectrum too, that think and ponder and worry and wade through self discovery, and they like to talk about it, too, but, well, they can only stand to talk to you about your shit for so long, and then they want to move on, and they desperately wish that you would move on as well. They have depth, they think about their thoughts and feelings and emotions, and they just don't want to dwell on yours for too long.
So, yeah, I could find someone who could say, "Yeah, I hear that," who would bolster my confidence and make me feel good, but the fact of the matter is...for me...one conversation just isn't going to make it all better. Saying it aloud doesn't release its hold on me. I wish. No, I need revisiting, reminders, and rehashing. (Well, I think I do.)
And who wants to deal with that? It gets old! My people have every right to be sick of my shit! I run the same cycles over and over again, and it's boring! It's irritating, it's self-indulgent, it's enough already!
And then, I realize that I am being repetitive and dull and...[yawn] who cares? And that thought smacks me right between the eyes, and I'm back to feeling low. Silly and pathetic. Buried under six feet of insecurities...
And here I am, back to where I began: I am the only one who can face my fears. Because in the end, no one will break this cycle...except me.
